While attending art school, I enrolled in a media arts course and found out I loved to design storyboards.  It was just like writing cartoon panels.  We had an assignment to come up with our own TV show and it's theme song jingle.  It had to be a minute or less. I submitted an old TV Western called THE FABULOUS MISADVENTURES OF COW CORY AND BLACK JACK JONES.  Bobby Jones, my pal from art school played the villain and way back then I was a clean cut kid, and always wanted to be a Gene, Roy or Tex. 

 

I did a storyboard and Bobby and I sang it to the class as we presented it  Not only did the class wet themselves, but our teacher fell off of her chair ( that could've been from the Absolut Vodka she always added to her OJ ). We were poorly dressed as cowboys and we were yee hawing and galloping all about.  Our teacher demanded I write a pilot episode. But instead of that I began writing a ballad about COW CORY, A REAL FUN GUY (like fungus) and before you know it, I had about 6 people from my class who wanted to partake in the TV show. Probably because they knew they’d get an A+. I really went the extra mile on my assignments. We recorded a 4 minute song in the recording studio at the Art Institute of Pittsburgh and we all sailed through that class, accepting nothing less than an A.

 

So, I was called Cow Cory a lot back in school. The nickname also followed me in my square dance calling, because like the stereotypical caller, I despised Hats and Boots. I always wear ball caps and sneaks. When you see me in a cowboy hat, it’s not only a rare site, but it’s usually a joke or a promo for something funny.

 

Here are the lyrics to COW CORY, A REAL NICE GUY. Sung to the tune GHOST RIDERS IN THE SKY

AN OLD COWBOY CAME MOSEYING THROUGH TOWN ONE MUGGY MORN, LITTLE DID THE TOWNFOLK KNOW, A COUNTRY STAR WAS BORN. HE WAS DRESSED IN WHITE, WITH DINGOS, SPURS AND STOOD SIX FEET HIGH. HE DIDN’T SMOKE, HE DIDN’T DRINK AND HE WAS A NICE GUY

 

CHORUS: YIPPY-I-OH, YIPPY-I-A! ( moos and brays )COW CORY, A REAL NICE GUY

 

HE STRUTTED INTO THE SALOON AND ORDERED A CUP OF MILK, THE CAN CAN GALS WERE ALL IMPRESSED AND STARTED SHOWING OFF THEIR SILK. COW CORY GLANCED AT ONE GIRL WEARING A RUFFLED RING OF LACE, SHE SMILED AND SHE SAID. “WHAT BRINGS YOU TO THIS PLACE?”

 

CHORUS: YIPPY-I-OH, YIPPY-I-A! ( moos and brays )COW CORY, A REAL CUTE GUY

 

HE TIPPED HIS HAT AND STARTED TO SAY WITH A SMIRKY GRIN, BUT JUST BEFORE HE SAID A WORD HE HEARD SOME GALLOPING, OFF IN THE DISTANCE RODE SOME DUDES ALL DECKED OUT IN BLACK. SCRUFFY, SMELLY, LEAN AND MEAN, EACH WITH A SIX PACK

 

YIPPY-I-OH, YIPPY-I-A! ( moos and brays )COW CORY, A REAL DEAD GUY

 

COW CORY HAD NO RESPECT FOR GUYS WHO WERE STONED DRUNK ( BURP ) A CLEAN CUT KID ABOUT TO HAVE A SHOWDOWN WITH SOME PUNKS. ONE CALLED FROM HIS HORSE, “HEY SISSY WEARING WHITE, WHY DON’T YOU COME OUT FROM THE BAR SO WE CAN HAVE A FUN?”

 

CHORUS: YIPPY-I-OH, YIPPY-I-A! ( moos and brays )COW CORY, A REAL FUN GUY

 

FOLKS CALL ME BLACK JACK JONES AND YOU’RE FLIRTING WITH MY CHICK, COW CORY STARED AT JONES AND SAID, “YOU TALKING TO ME SLICK?” THE TUMBLEWEEKDS BLEW AROUND AND COR WAS IN NO MOOD, HE KNEW THAT HE’D BE WASTING TIME WITH THIS SCRUFFY DUDE.

 

CHORUS: YIPPY-I-OH, YIPPY-I-U! ( moos and brays )BLACK JACK JONES’ A REAL MEAN DUDE

 

BLACK JACK BELLOWED, “ WHAT A WIMP! YOU DRINK CALCIUM. THE LAST HOMBRE WHO ORDERED MILK, HAD BULLETS ALL THROUGH HIM. KINDA DIFFICULT TO DRINK THAT STUFF WHEN YOU’RE ALL FILLED WITH HOLES.” COW CORY DIDN’T LIKE THE GUYS WHO MADE HIM LOOK THE FOOL

 

CHORUS: YIPPY-I-OH, YIPPY-I-AW! ( moos and brays )COW CORY, MAKE YOUR DRAW

 

COW CORY SAID, “LISTEN, BRO, MILK COMES FROM THE COWS” HE DREW OUT HIS SIX SHOTS JUST TO MOVE OLD BLACK JACK’S BOWELS. SO WHY DO YOU AND YOUR POSSE, GET OUTTA TOWN, IF YA WOULD, AND REMEMBER MAN, WHAT COW CORY SAYS “ MILK DOES THE BODY GOOD!”

 

YIPPY-I-OH, YIPPY-I-A! ( moos and brays )COW CORY, RIDES AWAY

Not long after our presentation of this TV western/comedy, Erin Cooley and I were at the beach and got this great photograph taken.